I started back to work yesterday. Am I happy to be here? Not really, just don't tell the boss. I pictured coming back to be very difficult, especially with all of the people who did not find out that Matthew died, asking how the baby is. But actually, those are the people that I am enjoying attention from. They are about the only ones who will talk to me, with the exception of a select few who came over and asked how I was doing, and expressed their condolences. I just want people to be real with me....talk to me....just tell me they are sorry. Please don't ignore me! And thank you to the engineer who came over without the slightest idea what had happened. He wanted to hear what happened, wanted to see Matthew's pictures. It was such a relief just to talk about it. I cried, and it felt so good!
So back to work....I can't focus, very antsy, and pretty much miserable. However, I did start a side job from home and am working my hardest to move up as quickly as possible. It's for Arbonne, and we sell botanically based cosmetics, anti-aging, baby care, mens products, weight loss, and more. I absolutely love it! My sponsor and awesome friend who lost her baby girl six years ago introduced me to it. The products are amazing, everyone that I have met are christians and they put God first. How awesome is that?!! I prayed about this opportunity, and God directed me through it. He is my number one, and I give Him all the glory!
That's it for now...Matthew's two month birthday is coming up on Friday, so there should be another update coming soon!
Confidence
6 years ago
2 comments:
Where do you work Jenn? I understand if you don't want to name companies or something...I was just curious. :) Have ya'll been getting all the crappy storms in FL that keep blowing through GA? If I hear one more mention about a drought...I'm going down to the news station to have a talk with someone. ;)
You are still in my prayers, and Matthew will always be in my thoughts. hugs!
I haven't even lost Vayden, and still so many of the people who knew me before seem to not have any words to say to me. Not even I'm so sorry. I know how it feels, it's not like you have a 3rd eye or something. I'm sorry your day back at work was a lil hard. But I pray ppl will come around and be the same if not better than they were before you left.
-steph
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