6 months. Wow. I can't believe how the time has gone by. It is such a significant time, yet I don't have much to say. Why is it that time seems to crawl ever so slowly when you are pregnant, but with an event such as the loss of a loved one when you want everything to be at a standstill, it goes lightening fast? I never quite got that.
Six months is such an adorable age when they really start to show their little personalities. I was thinking today about what he would have been like and what he would have been doing. Grabbing his little toes, crawling all over the place, giving me the biggest toothless grin...
We went to the cemetery this evening, and it was Josh's second time back since after the funeral. It had been atleast 2 months for me. I felt peace this time. Perhaps it was because we were all together, but it was the first time that I didn't shed a tear. I sat on the ground with Raleigh in my lap and we talked about his baby brother and how special he was and still is to our family. God has given me such a treasure in my family and I am such a lucky mommy!
Our son, Matthew, was diagnosed at the beginning of the second trimester with PUV- Posterior Urethral Valves which affects 1 in 8,000-10,000 boys. It is a blockage that prevents him from peeing, causing his bladder to fill up and the urine to back up into his ureters and kidneys. It can be fatal if not treated by in-utero surgery, which we were not a candidate for. PUV also causes extremely low amniotic fluid levels around the baby, called Olighydramnios, which put the lungs at risk. Matthew was born and went to be with the Lord on March 8th, 2009.
To read our story from the beginning, click here and start from the bottom.